Amanda Holden threatens to release song unless people donate to the NHS
Amanda Holden has threatened to release her cover of ‘Over the Rainbow’ unless people donate to the NHS. The ‘Britain’s Got Talent’ judge spent a…
NHS
NHS staff sending Matt Hancock a badge for his service
Doctors and nurses have raised funds for a special badge that they will send to Health Secretary Matt Hancock for all his service to the…
‘I said “I owe you my life”, not a bloody pay rise,’ Johnson tells NHS staff
Prime Minister Boris Johnson has thanked NHS staff for their care during his bout of the coronavirus but reminded them he only owes them his…
Hundreds dead after Dyson ventilators set to suck instead of blow
Hundreds of coronavirus patients have died in hospital after a new batch of Dyson ventilators were set to suck instead of blow. After a bulk…
NHS eagerly awaiting the first of its weekly instalments of £350 million
With Brexit Day upon us, the NHS is eagerly awaiting the first of its weekly instalments of £350 million, as promised by Prime Minister Boris…
A&E to refuse to treat patients who check-in on Facebook without explaining why they’re there
Accident & Emergency rooms will refuse to treat patients who check-in on Facebook without explaining further, in an effort to reduce bullshit visits from drama…
Laughter now the only medicine NHS can afford to prescribe
The NHS is so cash strapped that the only medicine it can afford to prescribe to patients is laughter, according to reports. Due to budgetary…
Alcoholism ‘now advisable’, NHS staff suggests
Alcoholism is no longer something to be avoided, it’s something to seriously consider for your mental health, according to NHS doctors and nurses. While heavy…
Johnson to tackle climate change by selling the NHS, putting an end to overpopulation
Prime Minister Boris Johnson has today promised to start tackling climate change in Britain by selling off the NHS in a move that should drastically…
Boris Johnson hires 50,000 naughty nurses to celebrate election win
Prime Minister Boris Johnson has hired 50,000 naughty nurses to help celebrate his general election victory. While 19,000 of the naughty nurses were already on…