‘Cheat day’ enters sixth month uninterrupted
A man’s ‘cheat day’ is now entering its sixth month and appears to be unstoppable at this point in time. Darren Stone, 36, used to…
Lockdown
Boris Johnson announces easing of lockdown restrictions in time for mistress’s birthday
Prime Minister Boris Johnson has announced an easing of lockdown restrictions just in time for the upcoming birthday of one of his mistresses. Johnson, ever…
Young Conservatives meet after government allows gatherings of six people or less
All members of the Young Conservative have met-up with each other today after the government announced they’d allow gatherings of six people or less. With…
Durham Police says Dominic Cummings broke lockdown rules, causing Boris Johnson to finally sack Durham Police
Durham Police announced that their investigation found that Dominic Cummings was guilty of committing a lockdown violation, causing Prime Minister Boris Johnson to finally sack…
Thousands of Brits at beaches ‘just arranging childcare’
Thousands of Brits enjoying a weekend at the beach are claiming they’re not breaking lockdown restrictions as they’re all just arranging childcare. The beach is…
The Proclaimers CAN walk 500 miles but CAN’T walk 500 more, according to new lockdown rules
The Proclaimers have been told that they’ll be allowed to walk 500 miles but they can’t walk 500 more, according to the new lockdown guidelines….
‘Now I’m immune everyone else can do whatever the fuck they want,’ laughs Boris
Prime Minister Boris Johnson is making a big push to end the coronavirus lockdown after realising he’s now immune to the disease so it doesn’t…
Hipster was broke, unemployed, housebound and anxious before it was cool
A hipster is claiming that he was broke, unemployed, housebound and constantly anxious way before it became popular. While having no money, no job, being…
Male flatmates about two days away from going ‘quarantine gay’
A couple of male flatmates are about two days away from screwing each other, a recent phenomenon known as going ‘quarantine gay’. With a lockdown…
U.S. lockdown to be extended permanently, rest of the world decides
The rest of the world has agreed that the U.S. lockdown should be extended permanently, no matter the outcome of the coronavirus outbreak. A permanent…