Almost half of the population could be suffering from attention something or other, according to a man whose name we forgot.

The man, who was a bit long-winded for our liking, claimed that almost 50% of people display severe signs of attention something or other.

‘Blah blah blah. I’m a boring old white man. This is what I think about absolutely everything. Blah blah blah. Mobile phones. Waffle. Memes. Young people these days. Attention something or other,’ we recall him saying.

If true, this could be huge news for people who care about this sort of thing.

The man went on to say some other things too. They weren’t as important though so we’ve not included them so as to keep your attention.

We failed to ask for anyone’s opinion on this news item because we kind of forgot that we had to get this written up today, so everything was a little last minute.